Who am I anymore? I feel like a mystery even to myself. I haven't been able to have personal time in ages. And even now, I should be doing something else. But ya know what, once in awhile I am allowed a few minutes right? Right. I have always considered my time management skills advanced. I was able to get my work done in school and still have time to work a couple part time jobs. I thought I had this balance thing down pat. But recently I realized, I am very good at managing deadlines and work, but personal time is almost nonexistent. Lately, I rarely spend time doing anything alone: painting, blogging, designing, fitness or decorating.
I spend most of my time at work; I love my full time job. I juggle the delicate balance between sleep and seeing Jas. At the end of every month I piece together the next issue of Speaking of Everything mag. And on the weekends I sometimes see friends. All these things are important and I love them. But I haven't read a book in... well a long time. And I haven't taken out my watercolors in... I really can't remember. I seem to have become dependent on other people to find happiness; I always need to be with another person. And I seem to have forgotten what it is like to expand my interests and discover who I am. When did I morph from someone who was completely independent, blissfully unaware of how precious personal time could be to a girl who never stops to smell the roses?
Have you ever felt like this before? If you realized you were missing something a while ago, what made you become aware? What helped impact your change?
If you are just realizing it now, here is what I am going to do and I am encouraging you to do the same. From today forward, I am going to spend 90 minutes every day taking time for myself. This time might be to paint, workout, learn a new language or even read. I want those precious minutes to be about improving myself. Don't get caught up in the constant rush of life; take those few minutes a day to breathe, relax, unwind or even challenge yourself. What will you do?